Yes, another dramatic event in the life of Jillian. Surprised?
Here's the scoop. Thursday evening I was jerked out of my sleep with major cramps. I couldn't get back to sleep for the pain and the worry. I awoke to no cramps but found out that my carpool had been changed. My dad could not get me that morning and he had arranged for Brother Ashley to pick me up instead. (We call all members of the church by either "Brother" or "Sister" making reference to how we are all a part of the family of God).
Brother Ashley is very close to our family and I was grateful that he was picking me up but something about it made me miserable. I couldnt' quite put my finger on it. He called me to ask me to walk to the Tim Hortons that is just down the street from my house and for some reason this put me in a foul mood. I even called my parents to wine like a little spoiled girl! But something was knawing on my spirit.
When the cramps started again in my belly I knew then why I was being such a miserable girl. I was worried about my baby and this alone had me grouchy. Instinctively the mother in me didn't want to walk or do anything to "rock the boat", so to speak.
I trucked on at work trying to ignore the pains. Sometimes when we are trying to cope with a difficult situation that is just to hard to face we often try to ignore it! Eventually the worried mamma in me cried out for help! It was time to face my problems. It was about 10:00 am in the morning on Friday, May 2nd, 2008.
I called my mother and first apologized for calling her earlier to gripe about the car pool situation. Then I broke down in tears and explained to her the belly pains I was having. She asked me if they resembled menstrual cramps. I hated admitting that yes, they did. She immedietley panicked along with me and told me I should have told Brother Ashley I couldn't walk. I explained to her that the pains began last night and that I had closed them from my mind by the time the morning came. She told me to call my Doctor and ask if I could pop in after work. She also told me to call Dad and tell him what was up. I asked her to do it but she said that I should because then he could pray for me over the phone. My dad said a very beautiful and powerful prayer commenting on how I was meant to be a mother.
I then called my Doctor's office. After explaining my situation the receptionist told me that they would prefer if I came in right away that morning. This caused me to worry more. I told her I would have to phone back as I would need to first arrange a ride. As soon as I hung up the phone I knew what I was going to do. If there was cause for great concern to my Doctor then I would not waste my time going to her office. If there was really something wrong there was nothing they could do for me there! I knew that I MUST go to Emergency and have an ultrasound.
I called my mom back to tell her of my doctor's reaction and my decision and see if there was a way for me to get to the hospital. My mother did not have the car as my brother had taken it to UBC that morning and I was already prepared to call a cab. However, I wanted to pick my mother up first as I would need her support.
There was no answer and so I phoned Ken to tell him everything that was going on. I told him of my decision and he fully supported me. My mom returned my call shortly after. "I'm sorry, Jill. I didn't answer because I was on the phone with Sister Luana and we were praying together on the phone for you. Sister Luana led the prayer and she really interceded for you.".
I have mentioned Sister Luana before in my blog. She is a beautiful Italian woman that is very dear to our family. She is probably over 50 years old now (although she certainly doesn't look it!) and she has been a part of my life since I was in the womb. She was actually the very one who led my parents to Christ. She has been an Aunt to me as I have grown up. But more than this she has been an inspiration and strength to me and my entire family. When Ken got saved and met her an instant bond formed and he knew why she was so special to our family.
I was moved to tears as soon as I heard that Sister Luana, of all people, was the one who prayed for me that morning. I began to tell mom about what my doctor's office had said and how I was determined to go to the Emergency and have an ultrasound. I explained my reasoning and she was instantly on board. "I'll call you right back", she said.
Five minutes ticked by slowly. In that five minutes I called up to my boss' office and told him the situation and that as soon as I could go to the hospital I would be leaving. My mom called back to tell me that Sister Luana was driving from Aldergrove to pick her up and then me up and that the three of us would go to the hospital together.
Fourty five minutes later (quarter to 11:00am) Sister Luana's silver sports car pulled up. My panick, worry, and despair melted away in the atmosphere that Luana brings with her everywhere. She boosted my faith levels for my dear baby. Mom felt the same way. Soon the drive became a cheerful chitter chatter of miracles, testimony's, and memories.
When we pulled up to the Emergency, Luanna announced that she was going to go find a parking spot. I tried desperatley to convince her that just driving me here was good enough and that she should head home and relax. Mom and I knew that she had just spent the last month in the hospital caring for her sick father. Mom felt guilty that she had burdened Luana with helping us that day but Luana dismissed the very idea of feeling guilty about such a thing. Mom kept commenting that "it must have just been God. You were the first preson I called without a second thought".
We waited in the waiting room for 5 hours when I finally convinced Sister Luana to take a hike. I explained to her that the wait was still another hour away and that by the time I got in to a room it could be another few hours wait. She was exhausted and she soon gave in to my persuasive talents. I was glad to have her company for so long and her constant Italian gum flappin' (lol) kept me distracted and in a positive mood.
I believe Sister Luana was there for another reason though. There was another Sister in the waiting room. One who we did not know well. As soon as I saw her I approached her to make introductions. "You are a sister, aren't you?". "Yes, I am", she said. "My name is Jillian Hart", I said as I shook her hand. "Monica", she replied. I asked her what was wrong and she made a comment about walking too far and something about her leg.
I mentioned to Luana, when she came back from parking, about Sister Monica but I don't think it really registered just then. She had other things on her mind. A couple hours later we saw Monica registering at the desk and Sister Luana said "Oh, that must be her!". She got up, approached Monica, put her arm across her shoulders, and began to pray for her quietley. No one could hear her prayer, except those at the registering desk I suppose, but Mom and I knew exactly what was going on. "Look at that!", my mom said. "Not ashamed at all. That's Sister Luana for ya!". We began to discuss what a wonderful woman Luana was. Little did we know that the registering administrative lady was having other thoughts.
When Luana had finished her prayer we saw her get right on her knees (in her beautiful skirt) and help Monica with the registration. Luana came back to tell us what the administration lady had said.
"I was going to bring you something but I could see you were busy". "Sorry. We were having prayer, you see.", Luana said in her sweet way. "I could see that", the lady said smugly. "We're just Christians you see....". Luana's sentence was cut off with "Yeah! JUST Christians....JUST Christians!".
How dare that lady? You never mock someone's faith especially in times of hardship. I would certainly not expect that from someone who works in the medical field who sees the suffering of people on a daily basis. Sometimes all someone has is their faith to hold on to and no one should ever look down on it or attempt to take that away! Just as I believe some will be blessed for the good they say and do so do I believe that others will be judged by God for the bad they say and do.
An administration clerk in a hospital has no right to even open her lips to comments such as those! Shame on her!
Anyways, opinions aside, I finally convinced Luana to go home and rest. An hour later yet another person was called in, prior to me, that had been there long after I had registered. If these people had been seriously injured my mother and I would not have stirred. But, it was beginning to get ridiculous! I hadn't eaten or drinken a thing all day and upon registering I was instructed to not eat or drink anything at ALL! Six hours I had gone without eating or drinking in that waiting room and all on the instruction of the medical staff. Not to mention I had only had half a digestive cookie and a couple sips of chammomile tea earlier that morning. They said that eating or drinking would effect the ultrasound so I patiently waited.
My mother had had quite enough! She stormed over to the registration desk to inquire and to explain that they could not expect this of a pregnant woman any longer! While my mom stormed off two East Indian girls sitting in front of me asked how long had I been waiting. I told them my predicament: pregnant, not eating, people going in before me "and on top of all this my baby could be in danger", I added.
"Mine too!", one said to me. She then began to tell me that she went through the exact same thing the day before. Waiting for hours without food or drink and to only be sent away to come the next morning for an ultrasound! She said she came that morning for the ultrasound and that they sent her away to come back later for the results. "That's what I'm doing here", she said. She told me how much it angered her to wait in line a third time just for the results!
I looked over at my mom just then who was talking to the girl who admitted me and the girl who told me not to eat or drink. The girl raised her voice against MY mother "Look, in my experience they'll just ask her to come back tomorrow morning for the ultrasound. It's getting late.". This very same girl is the one who admitted me. Upon admitting me I told her everything I had been through latley: flu, absessed tooth, tooth pulling, my doctor telling me the absessed tooth put me at risk for miscarriage, and then bronchitus and a sinus infection. I told her all this over the last month combined with these cramps has me worried. I then said this to her, word for word, "Listen. I don't mean to be rude or pushy. But I came here with determiniation saying this 'I am not leaving her without an ultrasound'. I hope you can understand". She asked me how far along I was. When I told her I was 4 months pregnant, just today, she told me that it shouldn't be a problem.
After all this, and hearing this pregnant East Indian girl's story, my greek temper flared!
I threw a temper tantrum right there in the Emergency room and gave all those bored sick people quite the show. All the while my eyes focused on the administration clerk from across the room attempting to shoot fire balls at her!
This is what I SHOUTED, "You told me not to eat or drink anything! I've been waiting 6 hours and I am pregnant! I told you I wasn't leaving here without an ultrasound and I meant it! I am NOT leaving here until I know my baby is safe!".
As soon as the words had flooded through my large greek mouth my mother rushed over to calm me but it was too late. There were no brakes and I knew it. I could feel all eyes on me and the whole waiting room was hushed. I knew I was not done my rant. Luckily, before I could take a breath to say more I heard a strong man's voice ring out "Jillian Hart!".
I grabbed my purse and marched through the doors that would lead me to my room. I was taken to a bed and a large woman approached me. She may have been overweight but she was large in more prominent ways: her face, her height, her smile, her hands, etc. Later I found that her heart was EQUALLY large. She had such a kind aura that I assumed she was a nurse. "My name is Doctor..." she began. I interrupted, "Excuse me. Did you say you were a Doctor?". "Yes. My name is Doctor Higgins.".
Tears came to my eyes. I could not believe that a Doctor had come to see me so soon! I began to tell her my story and what the clerk had said about not having an ultrasound until morning. "We'll talk about ultrasounds later", she said. I began to open my heart to her and in the process mentioned that I was four months pregnant.
"Four months pregnant? Well, that should be no problem. In fact, I have the machine right over here. Lay down and we'll give you an ultrasound".
"You are an angel. God bless you", I cried.
When she returned a few seconds later with the machine she began to explain that we was not a trained ultrasound technician but that she was only an Emergency Doctor and that she had taken a weekend course. She told me that she could give me an ultrasound and let me know if the baby was alive but that she would be unable to give me any finer details.
This was just fine with me! It had been my point all along! I told mom that I don't care who uses the machine - I just need to see the baby alive. I pulled down my skirt and the cold jelly felt like a warm salve to my soul. When the doctor saw my belly she told me that my uteris was rather large. This was somehow a comfort to me.
Almost instantly there was my baby! And as soon as we looked at the screen she waved her little arm! (excuse me while I call my baby a "she"). The doctors smiling face shone brighter. "It's waving at you!", she proclaimed. My mother and I began to cry. Mom was louder than I was, constantly cooing, but I forced my urge to cry away. I had shed one tear upon seeing my baby and that was enough! I did not want my vision blurred by one iota!
THIS IS NOT MY ACTUAL BABY! REAL ONE TO FOLLOW SOON IN 2 WEEKS! MY BABY WAS FACING THE OTHER DIRECTION WAS SITTING MORE UPRIGHT.
We could see her mouth moving from the side profile. "I wonder if she's sucking her thumb!", I said. When the doctor heard me refer to the baby as a "she", she explained that, at this stage, all baby's look like boys to her and that unfortunatley she was not qualified to determine the sex for me. I told her "That's fine! But I really believe it's a girl."
Unfortunatley, I cannot tell you the confirmation I received that day telling me yet AGAIN that I was having a girl. I can't explain why I can't share it with you but I can tell you in a couple weeks! Trust me - I WON'T forget to share this detail. But you'll have to wait for the mystery to be unveiled.
Her hands and arms were constantly moving and it was the MOST beautiful site I had ever laid my eyes upon! Her body suddenly jerked and her head bounced back. "Did she just hiccup?!!!", I asked. "She sure did! Let's see some more of this little sweet heart", she said. She was by far the nicest doctor I had ever met! She began to let us see the baby from all other angles. Each angle showed her busily moving her hands and arms.
It was when she put it straight on the baby's face that the real excitement began! We all know how alien baby's look in the beginning stages! An ultrasound goes through to the bones and they look even more alien! When she put the device at an angle that had us looking straight at the baby's face - she looked just like a skeleton face. But here's the thing! Her mouth was moving up and down in a constant motion as if she were laughing or talking.
"Your baby's singing to you!", the doctor joked. "How fitting", I thought to myself.
We all laughed and laughed at the strange site of this strange baby skeleton head moving her mouth up and down. We had not expected it! My mother who has had over 7 ultrasounds in her life (she has miscarried 3, you see) said that it was the most active ultrasound she had ever seen!
The doctor told me I had a nice sized baby and that she was very active - a great sign! The heart beat was recorded at 142 (2 more beats than last time) and I had never felt such joy in all my little life!
She checked my belly with her hands, all over, and said everything felt great. Then the doctor instructed me to go and give a urine sample. While we waited for the urine results a nurse came to take a blood sample. The urine sample came back showing that I had no infections. The doctor told me that further tests would be done to the urine later but that the most important factor had been ruled out. She told me I was free to go and that was exactly how I felt - FREE!
I was walking on air when I left and floated out of the Emergency without a care in the world. So much so that I sincerely regret not stopping to give comfort to the pregnant East Indian girl I had met earlier. I could have offered her prayer or at least told her that I would keep her in my prayers. I felt terrible about that later.
Mom and I called a cab and while we waited in another part of the hospital (a more peaceful area) I called Ken right away! He was happy for me but he expressed, in such faith, that he knew everything was fine from the start. When I told him about the baby moving her mouth as though she were talking he said "Just like her mother!". hahahahhaha
I then called Luana who was, of course, elated to hear the news. Dad had already called before we called the cab and he giggled as he was told the events of the day and rejoiced in our happiness.
Mom called my brother, Mike, who told Mom to "send Jill my love". This shocked me (my brother is not usually so warm) but it touched my heart.
The cab took us to our favorite sushi restaraunt where we celebrated and I gorged like you wouldn't believe! I am sure the baby was happy to finally eat something (especially Miso Soup - I crave this daily).
A cab took us back to mom's when we were done eating and I sat in a warm tub while I chatted happily with my husband on the phone. He was on the road, heading to mom's, to come and pick me up. While we were talking on the phone he came right into the bathroom and rubbed my belly in a greeting to the baby. I quickly dressed and we chatted for a bit with mom before heading to yet ANOTHER restaraunt so that Ken could eat.
That night, while we hung out in the family room, the baby kicked and kicked and kicked! I have never felt her so active! I believe she could feel my jubilant excitement! It was VERY exciting!
The whole day was ULTRA-BEAUTIFUL and I shan't forget it!
